Persistent errors in sentence structure and grammar detract from the quality of the response. Examples include the following:

“between Perry and Jerry that sells both men and women clothes and footwear for all age groups.” (mechanics: apostrophes missing for possessive)
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“There will be daily check on customer comments to ensure our business is functioning well and work on any correction, also ensure all information is up to date to avoid presenting inappropriate information to our customers and also to ensure the site is not hacked or tampered with my viruses.” (clarity, mechanics: missing article, incorrect verb tense, run-on sentence)

“Competitors are many because there more business people” (fluency: incomplete sentence – missing verb)

The submission mentions people wanting value for their money and saving time; however, specifics of how the Perry and Jerry will be viable in an online environment is needed.

The submission discusses Amazon’s and EBay’s positive and negative aspects; however, details of the online competitions’ web presence are needed to complete the prompt.

The submission discusses how the products will be delivered, and that the prices are better than competitors and mentions pay-per-click ads, and pop-ups; however, no details were provided. Additional development of the targeted audience along with details of 3-5 online marketing strategies is needed.

Images though Facebook & Twitter along with slide shares for “older people and the serious and highly literate people,” were discussed. However, additional details of how to expand the Perry and Jerry’s web presence are needed.

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